As a neurodivergent person who on the outside may appear competent and ‘together’ the majority of the time, let me show you what happens when the mask is off:
– Forget verbal instructions within seconds
– Spiral into crippling anxiety over perceived slights/criticism aka RSD (getting better with this)
– Motivation led not by necessity but by interest
– Remembering mistakes from years ago whilst forgetting the wins
– Anxiety over meeting people, often people I’ve known for years (more socially than work)
– Time blindness, there is only now and not now. Squeezing in jobs within minutes of needing to be somewhere
– Aiming for perfection to avoid any criticism and prove my competence when ‘good enough’ would save hours of work and would be of adequate quality
– Massive levels of concentration for stuff I am interested in
– Ability to produce work mega quick and mega slow depending on complexity/interest
– Constant battles over self-belief and confidence no matter what achievements/status I’ve reached (improving here!)
– Ability to break things in the most inventive ways, often happens like a domino rally with lots of parts colliding to break something at the end
– Study of other people’s body language/cues due to years of extra vigilance
– Terrible indecisiveness over complex and simple matters
– Flip-flopping, making a decision swiftly then regretting it later and changing my mind
– Great empathy and regard for others but with urge to be careful with it to maintain professional boundaries
– Need to be seen as credible and competent much more vital than being liked (in work life)
– Sadness and hopelessness when faced with long spells with no plans (getting better at living in the moment)
– Calling myself names that I wouldn’t dream of calling anyone else
– Prioritising being of service to others often at my own expense
– Irritating habit of thinking back years to mistakes made and urge to go back and correct or apologise
– Instinctively responding to requests for help immediately and without question when responding to say that I’ll get back to the requestor would be much better
I’ve had therapy privately for some years now and this continues to help with new understanding of what is being some of my behaviours. I also now access ADHD coaching which I find very helpful at home and in work. I also talk openly about the challenges and find many other people identifying similar in themselves.
#adhd is with you for life, like your blood group it is part of you. You don’t cure it, you learn how it drives you and you decide where you want to work with it and where you want to discover the real ‘unmasked’ you more.
I like to help and use my creativity for good purposes, please do spread the word about my site and separate store to raise awareness and socialise a massively common experience for people:
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